Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Why I Need an Intern, Palomino Towel Situation:by Allison
So all 3 of my girls are on swim team.
Which? Is great, we love swim team, great kids and coaches, fresh air, exercise, 6 hour meets (I am actually learning to have fun at those, shocking) all good things.
3 girls, sometimes two practices a day, somehow means eleventy towels are needed and have to be laundered urgently at all times.
We have tons of towels, yet the girls plow through them daily with abandon.
I am all, please hang them up to dry, and they think the chlorine on the towel is bad for their skin due to a misinterpretation of me saying Mommy Does Not Get In The Pool Because Chlorine Is Bad For My Skin.
So I am kind of screwed on that, and therefore towel frenzy.
Last night was a meet, and the girls all take at least 3 towels and make a nest with their teammates and at the end of the night, those towels are foul and gooey and covered with detritus that I do not understand, and instead of dealing with them I stayed up until 3 am converting Call Me Maybe lyrics for a flash mob I am planning.
So this morning, we are all sleepy and frantic to get to practice, and no towels.
I am forced to go to Most Secretest Hiding Place (in which today I found stocking stuffers from 3 years ago) to get the dreaded 1970's looking Hideous Huge Black Velourish Palomino Towels.
They are absurd, and embarrassing, and purchased by Matt at a Waves store in a failed attempt to keep sand out of his car at the beach.
He invented some weird system in which the Hideous Palominos are all spread everywhere and he had a cooler full of water to dip our feet in before getting in car, and I was telling him the whole time that it was futile, sand is going to get in the car, please stop doing this mad inventor stuff and let's go.
Palominos let us down, and when we got home, I washed and hid them far far away.
As precaution so he won't try that again.
Plus? They are really, really embarrassing.
And I have 3 girls.
And I would have LOVED those towels during my Misty Of Chincoteague day, s and I am afraid they will try and take them to the pool and people will think we have black velvet art on our walls and mood lamps.
But writing this gives me an idea.
I am going to wrestle the Palominos from them, wash them, and send them to one of Matt's medical school roommates.
The whole story is for another post, if I try to start in on that I am going to somehow be the cause of blog word limits,
but Matt lived in a ludicrous converted (by them) office building downtown,
and the guys made it semi-livable and all had like 4 rooms for themselves and I was constantly baffled they had stalls in their bathrooms,
but you didn't always see the roommates because it was a tall office building.
One of the roommates showed me his boudoir one day, and I am dead serious:
black satin sheets,
black velvet art depicting topless ladies riding unicorns,
mirror on ceiling.
Plus, said roommate had long Fabio hair and went shirtless while wearing leather pants.
He was in great shape and wore his pants well, but I have leather pants and I would not go to class or anatomy or whatever in them.
By the way, I am itching to write about that insane living situation, it is now percolating in my head.
But for now, must solve Palomino towel problem created by lack of clean normal swim towels, which is why I so want an intern.
Posted by Allison at 9:26 AM
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